Inspiration Arie lived by

In nature and in the world of the animals, there are very clear and simple rules. The mother or parents teach and support the little baby. Born to be independent and to be able to get their food, they learn how to protect themselves from other animals not to be killed, and how to act when danger is coming as a single one or in the frame of a family.

At the end of the learning period and while grown up, responsibility is transferred. The parents are free of worry or responsibility for the kids, other than the collective responsibility for the family or tribe in the jungle that is threatened in every corner and every minute in order to protect their well-being.

With people, in most of the cases, the parents continue to hold on to the responsibility for their children even when they are already grown up and even after they have their own family. Maybe that is the case specifically within the Jewish community.

In that case, you just take away the possibility from the kids to rely on themselves and they may remain without any self-confidence and dependent on the parents. On the other hand, the parents become slaves and continue to hold on to the responsibility for the lives of their children, which causes frustration and pain. This leads the parents not to be able to live their own lives. It also causes friction and inconvenience, which eventually leads to diseases. Suddenly you wake up and discover that life is over.

I remember the wise saying, "Teach your son to fish, but don't give him the fish." That kind of wisdom we can find in the animals as a fact of life. People, who are supposed to be smarter, are more complicated. The fight between logic, feelings and the need to help causes only confusion, hurting the kids and the parents, instead of living in harmony and love consciously. Conflicts are being created that hurt both sides. And to whom? The people who are so close to you, that you love the most, a piece of your own flesh and blood.

I remember points where I have been confused and debated with myself.

"Why do I want to give to my children more than what they need?"

I also tried to protect myself by saying, "In my heart and soul I want to give to my children the things that I have not been given as a child," due to the situation at the time, being a child without parents and having to face war times. Here the feeling worked. The need is that the cow wants to give to the veal more than the veal wants to be fed.

In this theory I have continued during my life. We have helped in money and gifts as per the circumstances to each and every one of our kids and also to the grandchildren, while me and my wife were the last priority.

Only during the recent years we reached the conclusion that we have to take care of ourselves FIRST. In that way we are also doing a good deed for our children in order not to become a burden on them.

What is more important is to provide the children and the grandchildren with values, life wisdom and our experience. Lots of love for a full life, being conscious and keeping the family together with mutual respect, to take advantage of every minute in living life in happiness and joy.

While our time will come to leave this world - everything we own in terms of assets or money will be going to the kids with love. That will only help them to ease their daily routines or for the purpose of learning, studying and to promote their way in life.

2009-06-25 MEDITATION - PRIORITIES IN LIFE (TIME MANAGEMENT)

Today in my meditation I went back to when I was 6 or 7 years old. My Mom had passed away and I was wondering, "Will I die as well??"

I started to be afraid. I didn't want to die ... which meant that already when young, without understanding exactly what life is all about and what death means, you want to preserve life. As you grow older, you start to understand that man appears on the globe, plays his role in life and disappears as if he was never here. You know that life is short. You know that you want to be able to do as many things as possible.

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